WHEN LESS IS MORE

WHEN "LESS" IS "MORE"
by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D.

There is a strange addiction in our society today. I call it the addiction to more...more...more. Sound familiar? More clothes. Bigger houses. Fancier cars. Exhausting! You may think that excessive accumulation is a characteristic only of the rich. Not so! I have visited many homes of rich and poor alike, and I am struck by the excess of "things" that seem to be everywhere. I would suggest that our need to accumulate more...more...more is not improving our lives; rather it is bringing the quality of our lives down...down...down.
If you think about it, our lives would be so much easier if we would focus on getting rid of things instead of accumulating things. By definition, our addiction to "more" creates a need to work so hard that true enjoyment of life becomes impossible. There is no time to stop and smell the proverbial roses. We become prisoners of responsibility. We struggle to relax. We work so hard on the upkeep of our lives that we have little time for pleasure and play. Our self-created burdens are very heavy, indeed. As I say in End the Struggle and Dance with Life...
"The clutter in our lives makes us feel as though we are going through life carrying a watermelon and an overloaded suitcase! It's time to drop these tremendous weights and learn how to live in the freedom that simplicity allows."
Let me introduce you to three new words to help you break your addiction to more...more...more. Those three words are simply..."LESS...LESS...LESS." Right now say these powerful words to yourself over and over again..."LESS...LESS...LESS." As you keep repeating these words, I predict that you will soon feel a sense of release...of freedom. Breathing space at last!
I speak from experience. When Mark and I sold our large house, we moved into a very small apartment just to give us time to find ourselves a new house more suited to our needs. An acquaintance bought our excess furniture thus saving us the hassle of putting it all in storage. We figured we would start fresh and buy new furniture when we found our new house. Strangely as I watched our much loved "stuff" being carted away, instead of feeling sadness, it was as though a big load was being lifted from our lives. It was a wonderful introduction to the land of less...less...less. And it felt great.
We took a 6 month lease on our little apartment with the idea of soon finding our new home. Another surprise! We fell in love...love...love with our little space. As I write this, we've now been here, not 6 months, but 6 years! And neither one of us has any desire to move! It's cozy and romantic and comfortable. It is also easy...easy...easy. A perfect example of less being more.
And something else: When we moved into our little apartment, I had to get rid of so many clothes since closet space was very limited, and once again, I felt a sense of freedom. Why did I need all those clothes to begin with? I didn't! Some of the clothes I gave away I hadn't worn in years! And because I realize that I need less clothes, I am saving so much money. Again, less is turning out to be so much more.
Yes, we are certainly blessed when we have "enough." But today as I look around this big wide wonderful world of ours, enough doesn't seem to be enough! We live with a poverty mentality. It's hard to imagine that even wealthy people can have an intense poverty mentality, but many do! I call them "the affluent poor." Or we are competitive with others. We act as though we are fearful we will fall behind in our ability to outdo everyone else! I see it all around me.
It's interesting that we all put a premium on "filling" our lives. But I think so many of us have missed the point. It makes for a much richer life to let go of the external trappings that smother us and instead "fill" our lives with those riches that take us to a higher place. And what are those riches? Beautiful times with friends and family, relaxing time to read books and experiment with life, fulfilling time to contribute to the world, and so on. It is not about filling our lives with "stuff", but filling our lives with those experiences that bring us joy. I'm left with the conclusion that...raising our standard of living is truly about accumulating less and enjoying more!
One way we can break our addiction to more...more...more is to begin giving all the excess "stuff" away. In the beginning, it may be difficult letting go. Especially letting go of that belt you haven't worn for 10 years! (Trust me on this one!) To help you feel better about giving your stuff away, I suggest that you donate your excess clothes and dishes and furniture and books...and so on...to others who truly do need what is truly excessive and unnecessary in your life. As you do this, you realize that you have made someone else's life a little easier. You become a source of abundance to them. You make a difference in this world. You become the "giver" instead of the "taker." You ultimately feel lighter and fresher and better able to see what you really need. This is what I imagine "spring cleaning" is truly about.
So look around and start giving things away. Make a game out of it and discard as many unnecessary "weights" as you can in your home and office. My rule is this: Use and enjoy that which enriches your life; let go of that which is just excess baggage. You will be surprised at how much excess baggage you will be giving away! And, importantly, you will be joyful knowing how you have enriched the lives of others.
And something very...very...very important to think about: You will be doing so much to help the survival of the planet as you consume less...less...less. Wow! That should be enough of a grand motivator to get us all going!
I suggest that starting today...together...we all begin dropping " the watermelon and the overloaded suitcase" and enter the world of less...less...less. We'll be helping the world in so many ways. Whew! I can hear the sighs of relief coming to me from all over the world! Amazing!

GETTING OUT OF YOURSELF TO FIND MORE OF YOURSELF

GETTING OUT OF YOURSELF TO FIND MORE OF YOURSELF
by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D.

There are times on our Journey through life that we feel lost, unloved, helpless, and defeated. Until we find the huge amount of power and love that lives within us, these times happen much too frequently. What do we do when we find ourselves in such an unhappy space?

Some of us escape into the land of danger and defeat. We "get out of ourselves" by drinking too much, or taking drugs, or feeling sorry for ourselves, or complaining, or doing whatever stops us from doing what is truly necessary...and that is...taking responsibility for our experience of life. And we look out at the world with envy imagining that everyone else out has been given a more fulfilling life than we have. Not good!

There are much healthier and happier alternatives. One way we can take responsibility for our experience of life is to get out of ourselves and join those who are having a fulfilling life. We get out of ourselves in a way that is self-enhancing and incredibly satisfying. How do we do that? The answer is so simple, yet so huge in its force: We become part of a volunteer force whose sole purpose is to help others less fortunate than ourselves. We help feed and clothe the poor, we help build houses for those who have no homes, we visit the homes for the aged, we read to children in hospitals...and all manner of beautiful things. I call that becoming part of the dream.

As many of you know, I used to be Executive Director of a health facility in New York City which provided all sorts of health, educational, and recreational activities to the poor. It was a facility that relied on the help, not only of a paid staff, but a large number of volunteers. Those beautiful beings provided money, services, time, energy, love, caring and all manner of loving things to help those less fortunate then themselves.

Understand that not all of these volunteers were the moneyed of the community. I met "poor helping poor", people giving to their community in ways that touched the Soul. They taught me so much about what makes life worth living. And what makes life worth living is not only about finding love, caring, and all good things. No, it's also about giving love, caring, and all good things. It's not that getting isn't wonderful...it is. And learning how to take with gratitude is a sign of an open heart and brings us much joy. But giving is more than a joy in life, it is the way we find our self-confidence and sense of worth. And in the end, that is what we are all yearning for during those times when our lives seem so empty and unhappy. (Read those last two sentences again!)

Every day I saw firemen, policemen, society men and women, doctors, community members, college students showing up to dance with the needy, make them laugh, pass out lunches, wash dishes, contribute to the programming, and whatever else was needed. Why did they come? To help others, yes. But they also discovered the incredible joy and self-respect inherent in the act of giving. They discovered the immense power and love they held within themselves to reach out and help the world in their own special way.

One of the people who regularly volunteered was my daughter, Leslie. Happily, she learned at an early age what it meant to give of herself. She stuffed envelopes, washed dishes, and served coffee with the best of them. And she carried this learning into adulthood. One of her ways of getting out of herself has been to volunteer for Habitat for Humanity, a wonderful organization that builds houses for the poor. I have pictures of her hammering nails on the roof of a house-in-progress. Imagine her feeling of joy and healthy pride when the keys to that finally-completed house were handed over to a family who never before had a decent place in which to live. Leslie has never stopped her practice of getting out of herself to find more of herself.

Ely, a friend of mine who had a stroke, was able to feel blessed and abundant every time he volunteered, wheelchair and all, to help cook Thanksgiving dinner in a restaurant that was serving free meals for the homeless. He knows he counts, stroke and all. And during the rest of the year, he helps in many other uplifting ways. People who get the most out of volunteering, are those who make it a regular part of their lives...not just a Holiday special. To know we count each day of our lives is the greatest blessing we can ever realize.

Why does volunteering makes you feel so good about yourself? The answer is that it takes you out of your Lower Self...the weakest part of who you are...and elevates you to the best of who you are...the part of you that is loving, powerful and abundant...your Higher Self. And when you find your way to the best of who you are, your life is transformed.

So here is what I suggest for you: Any time you feel yourself in a depressed and unhappy state, immediately find some way to help the community. Get up and get out (literally or figuratively) and help the world. And as you make helping others a part of your everyday life, those feelings of depression and unhappiness will appear less and less and less...and feelings of joy, gratitude, and all good things will appear more and more and more. It works every time.

See, I told you the answer was simple, but HUGE in its force.

HOW TO STICK TO YOUR EXCERCISE ROUTINE

You’ve heard it before: Regular exercise increases your energy and metabolism, improves strength and flexibility, decreases stress, brightens your mood and helps fight disease as you age. With all those fantastic benefits, why would you ever skip a workout?

Alas, fitting it in can be difficult as your life gets busier. What you need is a plan that makes out as much second nature as brushing your teeth.

Use these nine strategies to turn exercise into your favorite new habit.

1. Pick the right buddy

Exercising with a peer can make the difference between quitting or sticking with a fitness plan, but not just any old buddy will do. Find someone who’s fitter than you are, suggests John Jakicic, Ph.D., an associate professor of exercise science at Brown Medical School in Providence, Rhode Island, who supervises an ongoing exercise study called the Mentor Program. After starting 120 people on a walking plan, he split the group into “mentors” (those who excel at exercise and who were losing more weight) and “mentorees” (those who were lagging behind or weren’t seeing results). Jakicic found that not only do the the mentorees do better and stick to exercise when matched with advanced exercisers, but the mentors—who provide follow-up calls, companionship and advice—perform significantly better when paired with the mentorees.

2. Mix it up

“Motivation may ebb and flow over the course of a few months, so learn how to ride the waves,” says Scott. If you're occasionally uninspired or feel like you’ve hit a plateau, change your routine. Hire a personal trainer once a month to reorganize your program, try a martial arts class with your kids, or sign up for flamenco lessons. “You’ll be stronger and have more energy for all of your other activities, and it will keep you motivated to exercise,” says Scott. You can also spice things up simply by altering the intensity or duration of your workout or switching from weight machines to dumbbells. Research shows that your body adapts to an exercise after just two to three weeks. Think of this as your “grace period.” After that, you’ll stop seeing results unless you take action.

3. Get a daily dose

“To make exercise a ritual, avoid taking two consecutive days off,” urges Richard Cotton, chief exercise physiologist for First Fitness, a consulting company based in Salt Lake City. People who work out just once or twice a week are more likely to fall off the exercise wagon than those who do it three or more times a week, he explains. That’s because consistency affects adherence more do than how long you work out or what you do. The American College of Sports Medicine recommends that you exercise three to five days per week; if you can squeeze in only three, spread them out over the week to sustain your momentum.

4. Have a backup plan

Identify the scenarios that might derail your routine—vacations, holidays and work deadlines—and prepare an alternative workout strategy, says Andrea Dunn, Ph.D., associate director of the Cooper Institute of Aerobics Research in Dallas and coauthor of Active Living Every Day (Human Kinetics 2001). Make a list of these potential “barriers to fitness” on one side of a notebook and “solutions” on the other. Whenever you get sidetracked, you’ll know exactly what to do to overcome it. Above all, avoid berating yourself or adopting an all-or-nothing attitude. “You think, ‘I missed a workout today and I'm going away for the weekend, so I may as well give up and start fresh on Monday,’” says Dunn. “Instead of feeling guilty or frustrated, accept that you missed a few session and simply do better tomorrow.

5. Aim high–but not too high

Whether you want to increase your aerobic endurance or do 25 regulation-style push-ups, having something to work toward is a surefire way to keep you going. You’re more likely to stick to your goals, though, if you perceive them as short-term, specific and realistic, like “I will walk 20 minutes every day” (versus “I will exercise more”), says Brian Sharkey, Ph.D., former president of the American College of Sports Medicine and author of Fitness and Health, 5th Edition (Human Kinetics 2002). When you find yourself meeting goals with ease, set more challenging ones and revisit them every four to six weeks.

6. Chart your progress

Keeping written track of your fitness routine and your progress is one of the most effective ways to lose weight and stick with exercise, says Dunn. Research found that people who kept diet and/or workout logs lost weight while those who didn’t gained weight. Furthermore, those who kept detailed diaries lost twice as much weight as those who kept briefer logs. Be sure to record the type of activity, duration, intensity, distance, calories burned and location as well as your attitude (were you grumpy, high-energy, stressed, happy), how you slept the night before and any diet “blips”—“gorged on chocolate in the afternoon” or “skipped breakfast.” A pedometer, heart-rate monitor or stopwatch can provide the details you need to keep a complete diary and give you immediate gratification as well, says Los Angeles–based Reebok master trainer Jeffrey Scott. Knowing how far and how fast you run or walk, how many calories you burn and how intensely you’re working is an excellent motivator, especially if you compare it to your past performance.

7. Do “mini” workouts

If you’re strapped for time, keep your mind and body in the exercise groove by squeezing in just 10 to 15 minutes of activity. Do three such blocks a day and you up your chances of dropping unwanted pounds. Studies have found that people who participate in short bouts of exercise throughout the day accumulate more workout time per week than those who do a traditional 30- or 45-minute program, says Jakicic. “If you can’t walk for an hour, get out there for as long as you can, even if it’s just 15 minutes,”

8. Schedule exercise appointments

Leave sticky notes on your computer or set an alarm to go off at your regular workout hour each day. “A habit starts when you do the same thing at the same time almost every day—no excuses,” says Cotton. Once you’ve established a pattern, make that treadmill session as important as a meeting with the higher-ups. “The critical moment comes when you have a pile of papers waiting and deadlines looming but that alarm goes off and you head out the door,” he says. Research at First Fitness has shown that morning exercisers may be slightly more successful than afternoon or evening participants because they’re finished with exercise before distractions and fatigue hit. “But stick to the time that works best for you,”

9. Reward yoursel

fResearch from the Cooper Institute shows that people who reward themselves are two to three times more likely to meet the ACSM’s physical activity guidelines than people who don’t treat themselves. “One woman in our Project Active study decided that she’d take herself on a walking vacation in Ireland if she kept at it for a year—and she did,” Dunn explains. Another participant bought herself new walking shoes after the first two months and new workout clothes at the end of six months. The reward structure can be as simple as allowing yourself to watch Friends only after you do 100 crunches. “Just decide what’s important to you and link it to regular exercise,” says Dunn.

HOW TO INCREASE MORE TRAFFIC TO YOUR BLOG

It’s the dream of every blogger to get a lot of traffic, but something first time bloggers often don’t realize is that just publishing a few posts will not get them regular readers. I am no expert in getting traffic, but I have been working on a few things which has increased my traffic a lot.
When I first started this blog I used to get only about 10-20 visitors a day. After the first few months, I started getting traffic from Google and other search engines and my unique visitors increased to about 100 a day. Now for the past few weeks I have been getting about 550 visitors a day.
The sudden increase in traffic I had from about 100-500 visitors was mainly because my recent posts were linked back from many sites. So yes, linking can get you traffic depending on which sites link to you. Links can be thought of as the currency of blogs.
I received a lot of emails (even while writing this) from bloggers asking how they can get more traffic, I hope this helps…

Blog Design
A good design won’t bring you traffic but it will get your visitors to stay longer. No one will stay on your blog too long if the layout or navigation annoys them. So the first thing to do is to select a good theme for your blog and then design your own header. The goal is to have a unique blog that stands out from all other blogs (making your visitors want to come back again and again).
Often bloggers select a theme and forget about the design. The problem here is that your blog will look similar to hundreds of blogs that use the same theme.
Your design should allow your visitors to access the main pages of your blog and to contact you easily. Your blog should have an about page and an author photo. The more a reader knows about you, the more they trust your content. You can find more info on this on my recent post - Common Weblogging Mistakes.

Quality Content
Your blog should have good content inorder to keep your visitors coming back. By good content I mean well written posts that are unique and useful at the same time. Writing original content is definitely the key.
Do not copy-paste contents directly from other blogs to your blog. Re-blogging is a bad thing and will kill your traffic. The solution here is to write that content in your own words adding your own unique ideas to it. And don’t forget to link to the original post.
The more engaged you are with your content, the more interesting it will be.

Get Links
The more links you have the more traffic you get. Like I said before links are the currency of blogs. So how do you go about getting links to your blog?
Well written posts are often linked back by many sites. You are lucky if you get linked by heavily trafficked sites.
Another way is to get links from other bloggers. Link to their blogs and ask them politely to do the same for you. Also visit the ‘links’ section of a blog (if they have one) and check for a link exchange form. If there is, submit your blog after linking to theirs.
You may also take part in other link exchanging programs.

Join Conversations
Most of my first visitors came to my blog because I left a comment on theirs. When you comment on a blog leave your blog address. Often people like to know who is reading their blog and will come visiting you.Readers of that blog will also pay a visit to your blog.But do not comment just for the sake of it. Make genuine comments that relate with the post. In the process you will not only get visitors to your blog but might also make friends.

Take part in Blog Top Sites
Submitting your blog to Blog Top Sites like topblogsites.net, blogtopsites.com and top100bloggers.com is another way to get more traffic. These networks make your blog easier to find and search for as well. After you sign up for an account on their website, you just need to copy a bit of code and paste it somewhere on your blog.
You can also take part in blog traffic exchange communities like BlogExplosion and BlogClicker.
To join these blog traffic exchange communities - visit the site, sign up, confirm your account, add your blog to the member directory and then start visiting other member’s blogs.
Basically, you need to earn ‘credits’ in order to get blog traffic exposure. These credits are often gained by visiting other member’s blogs. When you have enough credits, your blog becomes eligible for promotion. Usually, a link or graphic to your blog will be shown on the main site or in fellow member’s blogs. This is how other people find your blog.
Of course, the more members there are in the community, the more potential visitors. So, if you are part of a blog traffic community, it’s good to promote the communities you belong to as well. Besides, when you promote the community through a referral system, you get more credits too.

Tag Technorati
Technorati is one of the best traffic providers for bloggers. People find your blogs easily when people search by technorati tags. Technorati will rank your blog based on the number of links from other websites.The higher your rank the easier your blog is to find when people search for things.
If you do not have a Technorati account, signup here. After you have setup the main settings, such as your profile, you need to claim your blog.
Make good use of Technorati tags by tagging every keyword in each of your posts. If you use WordPress, I recommend Ultimate Tag Warrior (UTW) which makes tagging Technorati a lot easier.
By tagging your post effectively you will get a lot of quality traffic to your blog.

TIPS TO LOOK SLIM

Tips to look slim

There are times when you take a break from your sensible-eating and exercise regime and want to just lie back and enjoy all those forbidden foods. Well then you are bound to put on weight but until you have worked towards reducing the excess weight you can follow these few tips to look slim.

Stand comfortably erect and stick your stomach in. Good posture always makes youlook slimmer.

Dark colours such as olive, black, charcoal grey, and navy help make areas appear smaller so wear them where you think you need it. For most women it's from the waist down.

Avoid shiny or heavily textured fabrics. Shiny fabrics reflect light, making any area appear larger. Heavily texture fabrics only add extra weight.

Sewn-down pleats in skirts and blouses can both create a slimming effect. Include vertical lines in your accessories, such as long chains worn around the neck. Avoid extensive use of horizontal lines - belts, boat-collar blouses and borderprint skirts. These styles can add extra width to your body frame.

Your best asset is your face; so draw attention to it with scarves and jewellery worn around the face.

Introduce simple lines, such as A-line skirts, tailor-notched, collared blouses and blazers.

The oversized blazer is a great solution for camouflaging large derrieres and hips. Double-pleated skirts and trousers mask protruding stomachs and provide comfort as well.

If you want to appear thinner incorporate dark, cool and dull colours and textures. Dull textures absorb the light like wool or cotton. Some very slimming colours include black, navy, olive, violet, charcoal grey, chocolate brown,plum, eggplant and burgundy.

SHOPPING ON WOMEN'S MINDS AS MUCH AS SEX ON MEN'S

A fascinating survey has revealed that most of the young women think about shopping nearly as often as men think about sex.

A survey involving 778 women aged 19 to 45 showed that 74% of them think about shopping every minute.

Previous studies have claimed to support the widely held belief that young men think about sex every 52 seconds, while the subject crosses some women's minds only once a day.

Assuming eight hours of sleep a night means shopping trips consume womens thoughts an astonishing 960 times a day and 6720 times a week.

In the latest survey by a fashion magazine in Britain, two out of five women described themselves as shoe and bag "addicts", while the thoughts of more than one in ten focused on accessories or make up.

On average, those surveyed spent at least 30% of their annual income on clothes. Almost 50% respondents said that they did not wear everything in their warddrobe. Even the threat if a credit crunch will not stand in the way of a shopping spree, with 62% saying they will put the damage on their credit card.

Nearly a quarter said they would think nothing of spending $200 or more on an item they particulary wanted.

"People think about thing which bring them pleasurable feelings. The pleasure is usually in the anticipating abd planning,"psychologist of Glamorgan was quoted a saying by the Mail online of Britain. "But so may women displaying this level of preoccupation, thinking about something once a minute, would indicate widespread addictive behaviour," she stressed.

Perhaps the most troubling aspect of the poll for men was that half of women surveyed said they preferred shopping to spending time with their partner, and nearly s may acknowledged that they kept their shopping escapades secret from their partner to hide their level of spending.

THE BIGGEST BOOBS EVER

CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR EYES ? NEITHER CAN WE

MAXI MOUNDS EARLIER

Florida woman enters the record books withe ber 36mm bust, which gets "funny reactions in public".

Who says porn stars lack ambition ? Maxi Mounds has made a huge name for herself - by having the largest berast implants in the world.

Her 36mm bust each weighing 9 kg finally made it into the record books years after she learned there was a category for natural brasts.

"I contacted Guinness World Records and asked if they had a category for implants, but they said no, so I let it go," she said. "Then they asked me if I was interested, as they were creating a category. Eventually they told me I won."

Mounds, not her real name became a lap dancer in Florida in the 1990s. It was then the one-time ballet dancer and horse rider decided to enhance her figure.

"I had the old style sillicone implants," she said. "But then came all the scare stories, so I had them replaced with overfilled saline." But her chest began to sag. She then tubes put in her armpits, so she could be topped up.

In 2000, she had her implants removed and the pockets filled wotj plastic strings, a procedure, which has been banned. A solution ws injected to make the breasts produce fluid and inflate, but they kept on growing.

She doesn't have a boyfriend now. She said,"It takes a special type of person to be with someone who looks like me because of the reactions I get from people whenever I am out in public.

" I have seen some funny things happen. Men walking into things and getting slapped by their girlfriends because they were staring so hard."

ONE LINERS THAT WILL WORK IN OFFICE

Office can be quite painful sometimes, especially if you are in the wrong place. Here is a list of things that we know you would want to say at work and get away with. But unfortunately guys, freedom of speech is only in the constitution.

• I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't care.
• I see you have se aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
• It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word.
• You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
• I am already visualising the duet tape over your mouth.
• The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you are an astist.
• Someday we will look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
• I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
• I don't know what your problem is, but I will bet its hard to pronounce.
• Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
• I like you. You remind me of me when I was young and stupid.
• What am I ? Flypaper for geeks ?
• I am not being rude. You are just significant.
• I can see your point, but I still think you are full of it.
• Thank you. We are all refreshed and challanged by your unique point of view.
• It is a thankless job, but I have got Karma to burn off.
• No, my powers can be used only for good.
• I am really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me.
• Who me? I just wander from room to room.
• Hou about never ? Is never good for you ?
  

CONFUSED ABOUT CONDOM ?

ARE YOU CONFUSED ABOUT THESE LITTILE THINGS WICH ARE REALLY USEFUL. SO GO GET THE KNOWLEDGE ABOUT THEM.........

For many, condoms are the contraception of choice. Not only do these little latex miracles provide protection against pregnancy, they protect against many sexually transmitted diseases as well. Condoms have been used as birth control for hundreds of years. In days of old, the condom was shaped like a cap that fit over the head of the penis and was made of materials such as linen or sheepskin.
Fortunately, their shapes, materials, and effectiveness have drastically improved since the days of sheepskin protection. Today, there are hundreds of styles and types to choose from.

Types of condoms.
You can choose condoms that are rippled, studded, dry, powdered, lubricated, tinted, transparent, treated with spermicide, or various combinations of any these types. In addition, condoms come in different sizes, which may or may not be marked on the package. The best way to find a favorite is to try them out. Some brands are longer, wider, or thicker than others, so you may need to try a few before you find one that is comfortable for you. Condoms usually come with three or twelve per package. They can cost as little as a quarter each and as much as $2.50. The lubricated condoms are more expensive, as are specialty condoms made from animal tissue or polyurethane. Polyurethane or plastic condoms should only be used if you are allergic to latex, as breakage rates may be higher in non-latex condoms. Make sure to read the labels on the more unusual condoms to determine whether they protect against pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Also, pay attention to the expiration dates because condoms do lose their effectiveness with age. Condoms are available in drugstores, drug sections of larger stores, and family planning centers. They are also available on the Internet.

How to use a condom
Condoms need to be used properly in order to provide protection against pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, and the most important thing to remember is to handle them carefully. They are easily broken and are ineffective when damaged. Condoms should be stored in a cool, dry place, and it's best not to stash them continually in a back pocket, wallet, or glove compartment. Don't wait for the final moments to put it on...Don't wait for the final moments before orgasm to put on a condom. Pre-ejaculate can carry enough sperm to impregnate a woman. Men leak fluids from their penises before and after ejaculation, which can also carry enough germs to cause sexually transmitted infections. A fresh condom should be used each time a man is aroused. It's important that a partner be well lubricated before penetration with a condom. Not only does lubrication increase sensitivity and pleasure, it prevents condom tears. If you need to use lubricants, make sure that they are not oil-based, because oil can deteriorate latex and lead to breakage.

Putting it on
In the heat of the moment, it's essential to use special care and restraint when opening the condom package. Condoms usually are packaged and sealed in aluminum foil or plastic, and the condom can break very easily as you open the package. The condom should be placed over the tip of the erect penis, with extra space left at the tip. The condom is unrolled all the way to the base of the penis. Additional lubrication should be used if the condom is not already lubricated. After orgasm, when the man is pulling out of his partner's vagina, the condom needs to be held in place so that it doesn't come off. For maximal effectiveness, the penis should still be erect when it is removed from the vagina. Only when the penis is completely outside of the vagina should the condom be removed. It is also recommended that the penis be thoroughly washed after the condom comes off to ensure that no wayward sperm or germs make their way to the man's partner.

When bad things happen to good people
Sometimes condoms break. In the event that this happens, it is important to consult a physician about obtaining protection against pregnancy (the morning-after pill) and against sexually transmitted diseases. The good news is that studies indicate that the condom breakage rate in the United States is less than two percent. If condoms are used consistently and correctly, the pregnancy rate should be less than five percent per year. Unfortunately, many couples don't use the condom each and every time and, in these cases, the pregnancy rate will be higher.

Anal sex
It is important to remember that it is possible for either sex partner to become infected with HIV and other infections during anal sex. In general, the person receiving the semen is at greater risk of getting HIV because the lining of the rectum is thin and may allow the virus to enter the body during anal sex. However, a person who inserts his penis into an infected partner also is at risk because HIV can enter through the urethra or through small cuts or open sores on the penis. Having unprotected (without a condom) heterosexual or homosexual anal sex is considered to be very risky behavior. If people choose to have anal sex, they should always use a latex condom. While condoms work well most of the time, they are more likely to break during anal sex than during vaginal sex. A person should use a water-based lubricant in addition to the condom to reduce the chances of breakage.

Protection against sexually transmitted diseases
The best way to protect yourself against contracting an STD while having sex is to properly use a latex condom. No other type of condom provides as much protection. There is not much research data to show how effective plastic and animal-tissue condoms are for protection against sexually transmitted infections. Some viruses, such as hepatitis B and HIV, may be small enough to pass through the pores of animal tissue. Latex condoms have been shown to provide protection against pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, human immunodeficiency virus, vaginitis caused by infections like trichomoniasis, and vaginitis caused by changes in the pH balance of the vagina that can be triggered by semen chancroid. ConclusionThe condom is a good option for preventing pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Although it is the most proven and effective barrier, the condom may not prevent all cases of pregnancy, nor all cases of HIV, and people should be extremely careful even during protected intercourse.
That said, government-sponsored studies have shown that using a condom is 10,000 times safer than not using one in protecting against HIV. My recommendation to a couple using condoms is to use a latex condom in addition to other protection such as a diaphragm, cervical cap, contraceptive cream, foam, jelly, or even the birth control pill. This combination of contraception will provide you and your partner excellent protection from an unwanted pregnancy and/or sexually transmitted disease. Note, however, that spermicides containing nonoxynol-9 have been shown to be ineffective in preventing HIV transmission and may even increase the risk of infection. A recent WHO report advises against the use of condoms with nonoxynol-9, especially for women at high risk of HIV infection. There's only one happiness in life - To love & to be loved.

NEED THERAPY ?

IF YOU ARE HAVING PROBLEMS IN YOUR SEX LIFE YOU MIGHT CONSIDER GETTING PROFESSINAL HELP.

Sex or psychosexual therapy, has been around for decades and has proven success rates. Sex therapista are trained counsellors or medical professionals who have undertaken additional training in the physical and psychological issues dealing with sexual functioning.

Simply put, the problems fit into three basic categories: can't get it up, can't get it in, can't be bothered. In fact, therapists tackle pretty much any sexual problem that isn't sorting itself out. It may be a problem you've had for ages or it might be something that has developed after enjoying a good and healthy sex life previously.

You may know exactly what has caused your particular problem or like many, you may be mystified. Anyone can have a problem with his or her sex life. If you have a partner who won't go for therapy, even a few sessions on your own can be really helpful.

It seems to be harder for some people to ask for help about sexual problems. It's a very personal thing and most of us have been brought up to believe sex should come naturally.

Take a reality check. Sexual problems affect pretty much everyone at some stage in their life. For some, the problem goes away with time but for others, it might linger. So it helps to call in the experts. There are a number of places you can go to for psychosexual therapy. Remeber that sex is meant to be fun. If it isn't fun any more, do think of getting help.

COMMON SEXUAL WOES

• ERECTION PROBLEMS


• EJACULATING TOO QUICKLY


• PAINFUL INTERCOURSE


• CAN'T GET SEXUALLY EXCITED


• GONE OFF IT ALTOGETHER


• SEXUAL ADDICTION

HOW TO CURE RAZOR BURNS

CAUSES OF RAZOR BURNS

• Excessive use of aftershave and colognes can compound the problem of razor burns by causing dryness.
• Applying too much pressure while shaving can cause a razor burn owing to friction.
• Insufficient skin lubrication is another cause.
• Shaving in the direction opposite to hair growth is also a common cause for razor burns.

RAZOR BURNS HOME REMEDIES

FOR BURNING SENSATION

Dissolve two uncoated aspirins in tea spoon of warm water and mix into a paste. Apply this paste on the affected area. Wash it after sometime with lukewarm water. This will take care of the burning sensation.

FOR RAZOR BURNS

An effective razor burn mask can be made by mashing a couple of strawberrie with a one sppon of sour cream. Applu this mixture after shaving and leave it for 10 minutes. Do this twice a week for fresh, razor burn free skin. Witch hazel, mild salicylic acid solutions and Aloe Vera gel are known to provide relief for razor burns.

CONSUME FOODS RICH IN VITAMIN C

Although there are no specifications regarding diets to be followed for razor burns, consuming foods rich in Vitamin C should help in restoring the skin quickly.

OTHER SUGGESTIONS

• Use warm water to soften your skin and hair prior to shaving, alternatively shave right after a shower.
• Be sure to apply shaving cream, foam or soap in the opposite direction of hair growth, taking care to moisturize your skin as well as hair thoroughly.
• Start by shaving the easier areas first like jaw line, cheeks and neck.
• Shave in the direction of the hair growth (usually downward)
• Do not stretch your skin taut while shaving.
• Rinse your razor thoroighly after every use nd replace blades every week or more often if needed.
• Electric razors that work gently on your skin prevent razor burns. Use shave oil. Applying pre-shave oil as a first layer, prior to shaving creams and gels helps soften the beard and improve the shave quality.

TEA, COFFEE OR ME

HOW TO ASK HER OUT ?
You feel like you have met the girl fo your dreams. You like everything about her, right from the way her hair falls to the way she walks. Both of you meet often and have loads of things to talk about. You like her company and she seems as interested. in you as you are in her. Now, the most logical step seems to be asking her out on a date. If you want to know the answer of how to ask her out, read on.....

Girls are usually more sensitive than the guys. So, you should approach them for a date in a vry delicate manner.

Girls are less likely to go for a football match or a wrestling competition or parasailing on the first date. So, don't suggest it.

For girls, the first date is generally associated with small and cute things. So, it is better to ask her to go out for movies, plays or dinner.

HANDS ARE NOT ONLY FOR WRITING

WHAT KIND OF SLEEPER YOU ARE

THE PATTERN OF OUR SLEEP HAS A WAST IMPACT ON OUR PERSONALITY. SEE HOW WE CAN CHANGE OUR NEGATIVE ATTRIBUTES BY CHANGING OUR SLEEP PATTERNS.

SOMETHING IS MISSING

WHAT LOVE & MARRIAGE MEANS

ARE YOU A TURN ON FOR YOUR MAN/ WOMAN?
IF NOT, WHAT TURNS A WOMAN ON ? MEN READ ON...

• Whisper mre - but do not whisper too close to her ear. Be back one inch or so. The combination of light breath on her ear and words of genuine affection can be very poweful. Plus, it capitalises on the notion of privacy.
• Repeatedly call her by the pet name you have for her. If you don't have one, make one up and get her approval. Pet names demonstrate affection, a healthy dose of possessiveness, and it helps emphasise your identity as a couple. All of these things feed emotional attachments.
• Hold hands in public and gently squeeze hers every so often. This shows her a little possessiveness and protectiveness. Many women find it arousing when you proudly yet thoughtfully show off your identity as a couple to the rest of society.
• Tickle her playfully or initiate a tickle fight. This is a great way to introduce fun and laughter in to the bedroom, and it naturally leads to physiological arousal.
• Get her pulse going ! Go to a scary movie, an amusement park, a funny play or musical. Get her emotions running wild, and you will see that transfer to romaticism and sex drive.
• Exercise together. Strength training raises testosterone levels in both men and women which increases libido. You will both look better and have more stamina.
• Give her a hug from the opposite direction. By doing this you are introducing the element of surprise. Nothing deadens the heart like routine, so change it up and be creative.
• Try not speaking, but give her a penetrating look as though you see into her soul, the essence of who she is and that yoy would not change a thing. Think all that as you look at her. She will feel it as she reads your look. Try to hold that gaze.
• Do not just express your attraction. Sincerely express to her the emotional attachment and commitment you have to her. Let her know that she is first in your heart and mind. Actually notice how she looks and then follow up by sicerely complimenting what you see, and especially, how she make you feel.

WHAT TURNS A MAN ON? WOMEN READ ON .......
STANDING TALL
A woman stands tall, dresses well, exercises and is confident about her body. If she's proud of her figure no matter what shape or size and has good posture, men take notice.
TRUE GRIT
Men know that women cry and get hurt. Men want to be there to help. But there's somthing insanely attractive about women who can bite their lips, buck up and grit out some of life's twists and pains.
SOFTWARE SAVVY
Women like men who know hardware, and men like women who know software. Show a guy a woman who knows her way around systems, networks, and connections, he will be dazzled by her smarts. There's something sexy about a woman who can click a few buttons.
UNDERSTAND UNDERWEAR
Slinky and small lingerie works for anniversaries, birthday surprises, honeymoons, and other seduce me moments. But the look that makes men feel both comfortable and excited is when she is wearing boxers and a thin as can be T shirt that is neither too tight nor too big. Also wearing his old dress shirt and a pair of panties
SEXY SHAMPOO
Perfume and body lotion are nice but the smell of her freshly washed hair nestled up on a Sunday morning is a reminder of all that's good about relationships.
DIRT AND SWEAT
Men like to see their women dolled up for a night out. But many men appreciate the opposite. The woman who bikes, hikes, mows the lawn, hacks trees and branches.
A FEW 'DUH' MOMENTS
Men like smart women. But there is a part of a man is brain that wants her to have an occasional dollop of dizziness. It makes them feel needed, that he is trusted and that he can be there to help.